I meant to write this a couple of weeks ago but I kept forgetting. So here goes.
Those of you with children can understand this. Babies spit up milk all the time. It's disgusting. Certain formula smells worse than others, but sometimes you don't have a choice. The Dr. says use Nutramigen, then by golly you're kicking out the $25 a can because it's the only thing that will make your baby stop crying. $25 for piece of mind isn't so bad. But this blog isn't about spit up, it's about puke. Alex puked for the first time 2 weeks ago. Spit up is white. Puke is purple. And orange. And red. And it has carrots in it. And rice... And crackers and popscicles and chicken... No matter how bad your baby's formula smells, a toddler's puke takes it to a whole new level. And when you know your toddler is about to blow chunks and you have him leaning over the toilet, you forget that a 3 year old doesn't understand what is about to happen. So he turns and says "daddy?" in that voice where you know they're scared even though they shouldn't be. But wait, he turns! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! And you grab his head as fast as you can to turn it 180 degrees BACK to the toilet! But it's too late. You only make it half way... And the puke flies and hits the wall, and the towels, and the AC vent, and it gets stuck inside the AC vent, and it soaks the basket of TP you have sitting so elegantly displayed (well as elegantly as ass wiping paper can be displayed), and the smell hits you. Immediately you feel your own stomache start to purge. But you're an adult, and you know that you have to suck it up and endure. Now is not the time to blow chunks of your own. At this point you have the head pointing in the right direction and your childs stomache purges again, and again, and again. Finally coming to a close. Bathroom covered in puke you walk him to the sink to rinse his mouth, brush his teeth, take the little guy to his room where you've placed a TV so he can wash Monsters, Inc for the 73rd time. He laughs and says "spit up like baby?" Yes, Alex. Spit up like baby...not quite...but it makes him feel better to know it's no big deal. For him anyway. Now you have the task of cleaning the walls, and taking apart the AC vent and cleaning the puke from between the slats, and throwing out the TP that was so elegantly displayed. And you lose your own appetite. For two days. Just thinking of it makes me want to hurl. So I better stop before I make myself sick.
Just thought I'd share.
Those of you with children can understand this. Babies spit up milk all the time. It's disgusting. Certain formula smells worse than others, but sometimes you don't have a choice. The Dr. says use Nutramigen, then by golly you're kicking out the $25 a can because it's the only thing that will make your baby stop crying. $25 for piece of mind isn't so bad. But this blog isn't about spit up, it's about puke. Alex puked for the first time 2 weeks ago. Spit up is white. Puke is purple. And orange. And red. And it has carrots in it. And rice... And crackers and popscicles and chicken... No matter how bad your baby's formula smells, a toddler's puke takes it to a whole new level. And when you know your toddler is about to blow chunks and you have him leaning over the toilet, you forget that a 3 year old doesn't understand what is about to happen. So he turns and says "daddy?" in that voice where you know they're scared even though they shouldn't be. But wait, he turns! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! And you grab his head as fast as you can to turn it 180 degrees BACK to the toilet! But it's too late. You only make it half way... And the puke flies and hits the wall, and the towels, and the AC vent, and it gets stuck inside the AC vent, and it soaks the basket of TP you have sitting so elegantly displayed (well as elegantly as ass wiping paper can be displayed), and the smell hits you. Immediately you feel your own stomache start to purge. But you're an adult, and you know that you have to suck it up and endure. Now is not the time to blow chunks of your own. At this point you have the head pointing in the right direction and your childs stomache purges again, and again, and again. Finally coming to a close. Bathroom covered in puke you walk him to the sink to rinse his mouth, brush his teeth, take the little guy to his room where you've placed a TV so he can wash Monsters, Inc for the 73rd time. He laughs and says "spit up like baby?" Yes, Alex. Spit up like baby...not quite...but it makes him feel better to know it's no big deal. For him anyway. Now you have the task of cleaning the walls, and taking apart the AC vent and cleaning the puke from between the slats, and throwing out the TP that was so elegantly displayed. And you lose your own appetite. For two days. Just thinking of it makes me want to hurl. So I better stop before I make myself sick.
Just thought I'd share.